Are you suffering from painful intercourse?

November 2, 2006 | 57 Comments

Are you suffering from painful intercourse? If so, you are not alone. Female sexual pain is rarely discussed in the media, at the coffee shop or even in the doctor's office but it is a real problem for many women.

Ongoing sexual pain and discomfort can be destructive to relationships and to a woman's sense of wholeness. If pain continues, it is only natural that sexual contact will be avoided eventually leading to loss of interest in sexual intimacy altogether. Seeking help for sexual pain is just as important to a woman's health and well-being as getting help for a tooth-ache or broken leg. The pain and discomfort are real and often worsen without treatment.

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  1. Written by: PatienceIsAVirtue | January 9th, 2007

    My husband and I waited until our wedding night to have sex, only to find out we couldn't have intercourse. We pleasure each other in other ways, and are always very satisfied when intimate, but we didn't want to go the rest of our lives without experiencing intercourse. It's not simply's impossible. Like there's a wall there. Tampons have never been difficult to insert, so I didn't understand why this was happening. I kept thinking I was just a wimp, and couldn't deal with the pain of intercourse for the first time. I also thought maybe my husband was too large for me. Now I know neither of those are the case. I'm sexually stimulated very easily, and I don't avoid sex at all. But, I've had this fear that my husband will eventually get tired of doing everything but intercourse. Now that I've ordered the dilator/book kit, I'm looking forward to experiencing what most people take for granted. :)

  2. Written by: Bessie | June 12th, 2007

    My husband and I have been married for 11 years. We have been trying to have intercourse, year after year. I thought I was a loser, a weakling. I couldn't believe I couldn't handle pain. I always thought "how come everyone can do it but me? What is wrong with me?" I felt I was the only one in this world that had this problem. One day my husband came home and showed me this website he had printed out. It was about vaginismus and pages and pages of women sharing their stories, MY STORIES!!!! I started crying like a little baby. I couldn't believe I wasn't the only one in this world. I was not a wimp, I really had a problem. To make my very long story short, I bought the dilator/book kit. It took me about 2-3 months but I finally did it. I am finally having sex with the man I love most in this world. My husband was the one that found the site, who I will always be thankful to, not for finding it but for believing in me and not leaving me. And thank YOU for saving my marriage. Thank you so much. To all those women out there buy the dilator/book kit and be patient and also believe in yourself. It will happen to you, just like it happened to me. Now we can finally try to have kids, wish us luck!!!!

  3. Written by: michelle | June 28th, 2007

    I'm getting married in September and I'm afraid that my fiance will not want me after he finds out about my vag. I read the story of one women on a yahoo group who's husband left her after being with her for nearly 5 years because he simply couldn't live without the intimacy anymore. I'm afraid this will happen to me.

  4. Written by: zarra john | September 22nd, 2007

    its a good site.this site is helping ladies but there should b some pics ae wel.because i feel in some posture u feel pain and in some u dont feelwith pillow i feel less hopng u ll like my idea

  5. Written by: KENNY | October 24th, 2007


  6. Written by: Becky | February 14th, 2008

    I'm so happy to have found this site! I thought that I would never find answers, because doctors always sit there and scratch their heads when I try to tell them that sex hurts! I'm on the road to overcoming my vaginismus...thank you!

  7. Written by: Kathy | March 19th, 2008

    My husband and I were able to have intercourse the first four years of marriage. This past year I have suffered from vaginismus. I have gone through depression, despair, and then thankfully HOPE! It is hard to not feel sorry for yourself. We wanted to start having children about 2 years ago. My faith in God is what keeps me persevering. I have the whole kit and believe God will heal me! My husband has been more patient than I am and has supported me through this time. I pray for all those who suffer from sexual disorders.

  8. Written by: thewoman | April 5th, 2008

    there is terrible pain -- I am 49 and this just started a few months ago- went to dr had 2 exams all is fine-- dryness not a problem--this is awful PAIN-- it is weird ! vaginismus seems to be my every symptom--

  9. Written by: Marlene | June 5th, 2008

    I am sixty years old and enjoyed sex with my husband.Now it hurts and tears my vagina.Can you give me any suggestions in what I can do to prevent this.

  10. Written by: Jason | September 27th, 2008

    My new girlfriend has vaginismus. Before me, she was in a long-term relationship and only recently began having intercourse. She tells me that it was extremely uncomfortable and rarely, if ever, did she derive any physical pleasure from it. She further added that she was only capable of 10 minutes of coitus (penetration) tops!!! She has worked with several therapists for a year or so and has practiced vaginal penetration with dilators for quite a while. She is very easy to arouse, but tells me that penetration is extremely frightening and intercourse is very, very painful. From my general observation, it is obvious she is extremely anxious (not just sexually, but in other areas of her life). She is in her late 20's has only had one serious relationship and two sex partners. She and I have not even attempted sex and have been dating for two months. She is scared but willing to try. I am scared that if it dosen't work, our relationship will suffer before it even begins. I am very familiar with sex positions, understand kegal exercises, and have some experience with sensate focus exercise. In addition, I have formal training in various relaxation exercises (progressive muscle tension and release protocals in particular). What, if any do you guys recommend we try? Lastly, has anyone with a similar problem used monitoring devices? Specifically, biofeedback technologies that sit above the pelvic floor muscles and/or vaginal inserts that stimulate vaginal muscles for training purposes???

  11. Written by: Mindy | October 1st, 2008

    I am 19 years old and i have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. the first year and a half was great we could have sex with no problem, no pain at all. i found out i have endometriosis and i am on lupron depot (which means i am in medapause for 6 months) and i understand that vaginal dryness comes with the territory but the pain started before i started it. and now that i am on it it is so much worse. I am still in the mood and i really want to have sex but everytime we try it hurts so bad that i either have to tell him to stop or i make him hurry up and get off because i feel bad. i dont know what to do about this problem and i dont want to loose my life long partner because of this!

  12. Written by: Shelly | November 11th, 2008

    Hi mindy,i know what your goin thro. I'm 27,i've been wit my boyfriend four years.For the first year or so it was ok,i was always sore wit penetration but could manage n when i got used to it it was great.Then i found out i had endo.It began to get more i'm on lupron too and it's unbearable!Feels like when you first have sex and the skin tears,i hope we find some relief.If you have any tips please let me know.I am goin to buy a toy and try to use that to get used to penetration again!wish you luck.shelly

  13. Written by: Jennifer | January 5th, 2009

    I love my husband very much. We have been married a year and a half, but have been together for a little over 6 years! He's much larger than I am and sex has always been a little painful. I always thought it was just because he was so large, but lately it seemed as though I had 'shrunk' and simply could not accommodate him. I thought maybe it was because I had been exercising more often and had possibly inadvertently tightened my pc muscles, but nothing could explain the degree of pain I experienced. Thanks so very very much for these resources! It's nice to know I'm not alone here.

  14. Written by: info1 | January 5th, 2009

    Hi Jennifer, Thank you for your comment. If you would like to discuss this further, you can email us any time at Kind regards, Meg Customer Service

  15. Written by: Judy | January 26th, 2009

    I too, thought I was the only one to have vaginismus and felt ashamed that I couldn't have sex without extreme pain. I have been to gynocologists and tried one of the creams but no difference. I have had this problem since a few years after having a total vaginal hysterectomy. Could the hysterectomy have been the cause since it was done vaginally. Is there any hope of being normal again.

  16. Written by: Takara | March 7th, 2009

    I too have vaginism...It is hard for me to deal with this, but I know I can get better. I just feel so angry and unattractive sometimes because I know my husband wants to feel a real woman. I knew that there was something wrong with me and when I went to the doctors they continued to tell me I was just having some type of emotional crisis that has been making me tighten as they say. Please help me I want to give my husband all of me. What have you been doing?

  17. Written by: Jim | March 28th, 2009

    My wife and I had passionate sex for the for 10 years of our marriage. My wife is 10 years older than I. So always said that I was large for her. But within the last 1.5 years, it has been so painful for her that we have stopped having intercourse. It is impossible. Hopefully the info on this site will help us.

  18. Written by: info1 | March 29th, 2009

    Hi Jim, We would love to help. If you would like to discuss this further, please email Kind regards, Meg Customer Service

  19. Written by: Kari | May 9th, 2009

    I completely relate to Bessie and Patienceisavirtue. The only thing different with me, is that I actually could have sex. It was very very difficult, and it hurt extremely bad. I'll never forget my first time. It hurt worse than a penicilin shot. I didn't realize sex was supposed to feel this way, but I knew I wasn't a wimp. If everyone else went through this pain, then I could, too. I told my husband to go ahead, but I would have to scream. He didn't want me to scream, so he stopped. We took it slow and eventually succeeded that night, but not without much horrible pain. I thought surely the hymen was broken then, but sex continued to be extremely painful. I didn't know it was vaginisimus. I also remember my first medical exam and how painful it was. I thought it was supposed to be painful. Tampons always hurt a little, but I thought somehow sex would magically work. This went on for years, but it was greatly reduced after the birth of my first child. I have had 3 children since then. I remember giving birth to my first daughter and having the pain when she was coming out. When I asked other mothers about this specific pain I had while delivering her, none could relate to it. Sex hurt until after I had my 2nd child. Now I can have sex just fine, but I don't have orgasms (except in my sleep). It can feel good though. I just wonder if any other woman out there kept hurting herself like I did. I feel like I shouldn't have let myself be hurt excruciatingly over and over and over again, but I thought it was the only way to finally be over it. I didn't know it was making me worse. Is there anyone else out there like me?

    VAGINISMUS.COM RESPONSE: Hi Kari, thank you for your comment. It is important to note that involuntary tightness from vaginismus does not necessarily completely prevent intercourse, it may simply make it difficult and painful on an ongoing basis. Resolving the tightening and eliminating the involuntary tightening also serves to eliminate the pain. Once the pain is gone, couples can begin to actually enjoy intercourse as it should be.

  20. Written by: GINA | May 9th, 2009

    Im looking for any books nor any means to help me sort out my problems. Married for six years, but i can't still hav intercourse with my husband. I'm 42 yrs old now,and still a virgen. S ther any means to help me, without travelling abroad to get help? I'm so desperate, I really need help urgently. Pls help me. Thanks a lot.

  21. Written by: denise | May 11th, 2009

    I'm so glad i find this site. I'm 30 and married for five years. We've been together since 1994. I love my husband, but we almost got divorced because we can't have sex. He's very pacient, but is very sad with this situation, just like me. I hope now our marrige will change.

  22. Written by: Chloe | May 30th, 2009

    I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years, and it is a very serious relationship and we have tried to have sex numerous times and still nothing. It is usually like a wall...and then if he does get in, it's like 1 inch and it feels like knives are in me. I am glad I am not the only one and that this can hopefully be solved. I can't stand it when I hear kids in high school say to me how much sex they got last night when I am in college and still cannot have sex with my boyfriend. It's hard because doctors just tell me to be more aroused and use more lube...but nothing happens.

  23. Written by: Nicole | September 2nd, 2009

    Eversince I had my daughter it was impossible to even try to have sex, I been to 7 different OB/GYNs and they all told me I look normal besides my third degree. So my husband himself examined me internally and found that I have a mild Bladder prolapsed and also this VAGINISMUS problem. I start going to a physical therapy after 10 months of childbirth and did little improvement, now it's been 16 months without being able to still have sex, I feel like I'm going buts. My husband get only get in about one inch and afterwards it's like a sensitive wall blocking his way. My husband has been very patient with and his the one who actually investigated about my problem. This was torn me apart and have made me depressed, I want to have sex so badly but can't. I will right now purchase this kit and see if my sex life can be successful once again!

  24. Written by: sandrar | September 10th, 2009

    Hi! I was surfing and found your blog post... nice! I love your blog. :) Cheers! Sandra. R.

  25. Written by: E.IRIS | September 28th, 2009


  26. Written by: edgar | November 9th, 2009

    im starting to get very frustrated i been with my GF for 2 1/2 years. we slowly got into full penetration. once her hymen was obviously toren i thought she would finally enjoy it as much as me :( but the pain was still there and now its to the point where she has completely stopped being intimate. we hardly kiss now :( idk what to do to help her im starting to think she does not want help.

  27. Written by: nicola | December 4th, 2009

    ever since i had twins nearly 2 years ago its been very paintul to have sex with my partner i get these shotting pains i get them all the time but there more painful after i have sex

  28. Written by: Name | December 21st, 2009

    I am depressed.It seems like whatever I do, is not helping me.

  29. Written by: Hadeel | December 28th, 2009

    I got married 5 months ago, and it was my first sexual experience. and ever since then i cant handle the intercourse, we used many kinds of lubricants in order to help but they didnt work. i feel sorry for my husband! what shall i do??

  30. Written by: Cortney | March 16th, 2010

    My husband and I (both virgins) married 5 years ago. Our honeymoon was a nightmare. I have never been in so much pain. Intercourse never happened. I kept trying, saw GYN after GYN, Physical Therapist (specialist in pelvic floor muscles) and a Therapist. After Physical therapy and valium we managed to have sex and make a beautiful baby. After the baby I was told I should have no problems. We were so excited we tried again (without the therapy and valium) and couldn't do it. I was so distraught we've never tried again. My daughter is now two. I feel lonely and sad. We don't ever touch. If I act like I like it he pushes for I pick at him instead. It's a sad vicious cycle.....

  31. Written by: Me | April 18th, 2010

    I've known my girlfriend now for almost 4 years. We've been in a serious relationship for 2 of those years. We're both in our first long term relationship, and were virgins before we met. As much as we've tried, my girlfriend has never been able to enjoy sexual intercourse. At first we thought the pain she was experiencing was normal. We tried several times, on and off for months at a time, but it only ever seemed to get worse. It's now been over a year since we last attempted sex. I feel upset when my friends talk about sex, because I'd do anything to be able to feel intimate with the girl I love. I have fairly strong will power, and feel this has probably kept our relationship alive to some extent. I would consider myself to have a high sex drive. Unfortunately my girlfriend does not, and sex isn't as important to her as it is to me. I believe she has Vaginismus, and this could possibly explain her low sex drive. I know that if I suggested treatment, she wouldn't be interested. I love this girl very much, and one day would like to marry her, but I'm at my wits end :(

  32. Written by: trish | April 27th, 2010

    hi,really need some answers.I'm 28 and been with my boyfriend for almost 2 yrs now and never had an affair. Normally we have very enjoyable sexual intercourse,however recently it's become painful during penetration and there's uncommon dryness and a bit of burning and swelling....

  33. Written by: esther | May 10th, 2010

    Hi,really need some answers,i'm 25 and been with my boyfriend almost 2 years now and never had an affair.nomally we have enjoyable intercourse,however it's become painful during penetration and ther's uncommon dryness and bit of swelling

  34. Written by: rose86 | June 9th, 2010

    Hi my name is Cayley and I'm 24. At 18 I thought I had met my soul mate, sex was great and I felt so comfortable. 1yr together I fell pregnant, but found out I was ec topic. After this I am unable to have intercourse as it gives me cronic pain. 4yrs and I do not blame him for leaving as it is impossible to have sex anymore. I have been single now for 6months and to afraid to interact with men as I do not no how to go about saying I suffer with pain. I have no sexual drive now. I have had blood tests, laparoscapy, poked here there abd everywhere. Is all to much when I am not getting any answers. I'm scared I am going to be alone for the rest of my life, no children no husband just me. If anyone else has a similar story and answers it would really help.

  35. Written by: Rachel | October 18th, 2010

    Hi My name is Rachel and I'm 24. Looking at everyones testimonials is a little encouraging as it helps me to know i'm not alone. The whole Vaginismus issues was completely alien to me until I got back with my ex boyfriend after not having sex for a year due to religious reasons. I had previously been able to successfully have sex and enjoy it so you can imagine how shocked and confused I was when our attempts to have intercourse failed miserably due to what I know understand to be vaginismus. Before i had made a decision to wait till marriage to have sex, I went to the doctors to have a general check up and found that i had a polyp which they told me would have to be removed, however when I wen to the hospital to get it removed they told me that there was nothing there. Although I was relieved that I would no longer have to go through any removal surgery it still made me feel a little anxious. My ex was in fact the last person i had slept with before i made my decision and it was after our last encounter that that decision had been made. I thought maybe i needed more lubrication or maybe I was just tired and had lost my sex drive. I had gone back on the pill also and thought maybe that had played a part also. My estrogen levels were completely down if not non existent. I could hardly get wet and when I did it would happen at the wrong time. My boyfriend become impatient and we argued as he claimed it was all in my head. I was so confused and frustrated I couldn't understand what was happening, was God punishing me because I was having sexual relations before marriage. As a result sex become something i dreaded. I absolutely loved my boyfriend and I was very much sexual attracted to him it just was always almost a chore to have sex. Never romantic also having to coach each other through the beginning stage to enter and once he had entered it was only a matter of time before the painful burning would occur. It really did ruin our relationship we argued even more then usual and I felt so alone. When he finally left I lost every bit of confidence in me I thought i'd never be able to find someone else, that sex was now on going to be a curse. Eve now when i've tried to talk about it with close family members they look at me as though I'm making it up. I really am hopeful about the future and I'm thankful for this site. Hopefully i'll have enough money to buy the kit as I really don't want this to ruin the rest of my life or future relationships. Maybe it was just my vagina warning me that this person was just not the right person for me all I know is that things can only get better now.

  36. Written by: Jackie | December 11th, 2010

    Hi my name is Jackie and I'm 54 years old. I am a younger looking woman who was feeling old for the past 4 years, besides the female "sex problems" I was enduring, I am also contemplating total knee surgery (both knees)so a lot on my plate. I was thinking that my sexual pain was from my surgery in 1992, I had a fybroid tumour the size of a football removed off my womb. I did not have a hysterectomy - my ovaries are in tack. (The tumor was shrunk with a product injected into my hip each month, for 11 months called "Lupron"), the doctors wanted me to go further, but the medication was bouncing me off the walls. The tumor was now the size of a baseball at the time of my surgery and I wanted it OUT! .. My husband of 17years and I were having trouble with sex for a long time and after the surgery it didn't feel that much diffent.. He left me in 1997 -for the biggest reason I wasn't giving him a child. (something I can't fight). I met another man in 2002 and for a while it was really good, but then it started again, this time it was like there was something blocking and it hurt as he would push through and when he pulled out i was left with a burn. This started me to not want sex and I would find many excuses to pleasure him in different ways to avoid it, problem now was the intimacy was gone, which has put a huge strain on our relationship and my needs were not met. (My fault I thought. Yesterday I went to a Gynacologist and today I feel like a different woman. I started last night with a creme-insert. "Premarin Vag...conjugated estrogens". OMG this morning I feel NORMAL AND PRETTY again for the first time in a very long time. I know there is more I need to do - but Ladie's you are not alone and neither am I! GO to a doctor and get an appointment with the right doctor and look into it and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! We need to believe in our selves and take the steps necessary to feel good again! I pushed this off for WAY to many years! Have you as well? Where there is a WILL there is a WAY! I may or may not stay with my current lover - but at least I feel like a woman with a life again! Now anything is possible.

  37. Written by: Tiff | April 22nd, 2011

    I'm only 20 but I've known I've had this condition since I was about 15. Truth be told back then it didn't bother me because I felt like I was too young to even be concerned about about having sex. Now that I'm older and in college I feel so isolated. I find myself jealous of my friends and their sex lives. I've had the kit for almost three years now and have finally decided its time to overcome this. I've set up an appointment with my gynecologist because I also have vulvodynia. Hopefully I can overcome both of these conditions.

  38. Written by: NSU | May 22nd, 2011

    I am a 34 year old virgin. I got married 3 months ago and discovered on our honeymoon that I have vaginismus. My husband spent some time one of those nights, while I was sleeping, searching the internet to figure out why we could not have intercourse, and he told me in the morning when I woke up that I have vaginismus. I saw a gynecologist as soon as we arrived back from the honeymoon, and he agreed with the diagnosis. I have been working with the vaginismus kit for 2 months now, with some progress. However, lately I feel like progress is no longer happening. I am able to use a tampon now, but it is still painful. I have not been able to move up in the size of the dilators for the past 4 weeks. I am starting to get discouraged...

  39. Written by: Olivia | July 31st, 2011

    WOW.thought i was the only one with this type of pain. it started about 5 months ago. sex is almost unbearable i close my eyes and grip freaks my husband out.he doesnt knw wat to so lost right now i just want to give up on 22 this isnt suppose to happen.

  40. Written by: Jerusha | August 25th, 2011

    Me and my husband are married for the past 6 months(having sex for the past 6 months only after wedding)..but still the intercourse is painful esp to we have lost interest in it. the freq of having sex is just once in a getting pregnant is just a dream. i am quite afraid if we have any severe medical condition.I am quite interested and he too and we get into mood but when it comes to intercourse i just lie down without life when he is doing it. i know it hurts him so much but its too painful i m trying to tolerate it but i think i m tightening the muscle which is painful for him

  41. Written by: rani | November 24th, 2011

    Me and my husband are married for the past 11 months(having sex for the past 11 months only after wedding)..but still the intercourse is painful esp to me and pelvic was not penitrated still we have lost interest in it. .so getting pregnant is just a dream. i am quite afraid if we have any severe medical condition.I am quite interested and he too and we get into mood but when it comes to intercourse i just lie down without life when he is doing it. i know it hurts him so much but its too painful i m trying to tolerate it but i think i m tightening the muscle which is painful for him

  42. Written by: Caitlin | December 8th, 2011

    I'm 19 and cannot have sex with my boyfriend of 2 and a half years. I've been diagnosed with vaginismus/vulvodynia. I have been going to physical therapy and it has helped a lot, but still not enough to have sex. I'm hoping it will with time though, especially the dilators. My boyfriend has been so so supportive and we have gone 2 years through this together. We do not have sex and it's really nice that he doesn't ever pressure me. I feel sorry for the people who feel like they need to have sex because of their partner. I do sometimes feel bad, but my boyfriend knows the pain it causes me and does not even ask.

  43. Written by: sandi | April 8th, 2012

    I have been having vaginal pain for close to 10 years. Every time I go to a Dr they tell me they can find nothing wrong with me. I can't stand to have sex,use tampons, or even insert a finger in me. I am also dry all the time and any type of lube sets me on fire( even water based ky jelly). My husband is very supportive but a person can only take so much. Does anyone out there think this kit will work for me?

  44. Written by: mary | April 10th, 2012

    Me and my husband have been together for 14 years, we have never had a problem having intercourse. In the last year we have lost our first baby at 5 1/2 months pregnant,I had to have a medical dnc donge, and 2 months after that i came down with a very rare and aggressive brain cancer. e had had sex about 1 month after the loss of the baby. Then about 6 months after my cancer. We attempted to have sex the other day, we had plenty of four play, lubricant, he could barely get his finger in without it hurting, I tried and my finger barely goes in, I use tampons havent had a problem so i'm not sure what the problem could be. I put my finger in it feels very tight, thick and bumpy which i have never noticed before, so I'm wondering what could be wrong? Is it possible that not having stimulation in so long caused it, i was able to orgasm fine prior to use trying to have intercourse. I'm very worried, would cervical cancer cause this? please help would really like to know what could be wrong or if this is something i need to have checked out urgently!!

  45. Written by: jason | April 24th, 2012

    I know all too well what it is like to have painful intercourse. I suffer with CPPS and it gets worse every year. sexual dysfunction is like the last thing you would think would happen to you and when it does it takes its toll on you emotionally, physically, and worst of all romantically. I guess knowing your not alone might provide some peace of mind.

  46. Written by: Shaheeda | November 2nd, 2013

    Sexual intercourse is painful and hurts and i only enjoy the climax which does not even come as fully as it used to, husband cannot insert his penis very deep as this is much too painful

  47. Written by: Sanjeev Kumar | November 6th, 2013

    I got married one month ago during first night intercourse my wife so bleeding may be her hymen broke after that i gave her two days rest then we started sex but so far she is feeling so pain while every intercourse so tell me what should i do .

  48. Written by: Shron | November 11th, 2013

    I am 53 years old and I have stopped my period about 6 years, I could not have sex life because it is too dry and painful. could you give me some help please

  49. Written by: sheron | November 14th, 2013

    My husband and I have been married for 13 years. We have been trying to have intercourse, year after year. I thought I was a loser, a weakling. I couldn't believe I couldn't handle pain. I always thought "how come everyone can do it but me?

  50. Written by: Stefanie Thews | November 18th, 2013

    I have been having a real problem. Ever since I started getting my period I have had trouble with "fitting" things. To the point where had to use the slender ultralight tampons. Now have YEARS I finally worked up to regular and super if needed. But the real problem started when I had my first sexual intercourse. I new it was going to be painful. But not to extent it was at I tried to endure it and consecrate on the pleasure but eventually it got to hard to bare. I thought I just needed to get used to it and I would get over the pain. 2 years passed by and I finally had to courage to ask my gynecologist what to do. I had no hymen and she could find no cause to my pain. And she basically put me in a point of veiw that I would have to deal with this the rest of my life. Well 2 more years passed and I have pretty much given up having sex because it is too painful. And... I just do not know what to do. I feel like I will never have a normal sex life, I want kids. Will I ever be able to have them?

  51. Written by: marie | February 6th, 2014

    Hi I'm 20 years old .. after I lost my virginity to my high school crush , I never had sex after that .. I always wanted tobut everytime I tried it hurt . My last boyfriend and I tried so many times and it didn't work because it was so painful and plus he was a virgin :( .. eventually he broke up with me . Now I'm talking to guy for awhile now and we are starting to get intimate with eachother and I'm scared that it's not going to work when we try .. idk what to do because I don't won't him to leave me like the other guy did

  52. Written by: rosy | August 4th, 2014

    my wife feels real pain while making love

  53. Written by: Sarah | September 17th, 2014

    I'm in my mid twenties and have had intercourse a total of 8-10 times. It's always been painful. I know I haven't had sex many times but the last time I had sex the pain was so excruciating I had to think about something else just to get through it. This is not normal to me. Also, I don't get aroused by any form of intimacy. And i can't wear tampons for more than 3 min cause they start to hurt...Idk what's wrong with me.

  54. Written by: Brit | September 29th, 2014

    Hi I'm in my mid twenties and I tried to have sex even though I knew it hurts when I do have sex. It never hurt before but in the last two to three years it's been hurting. So I thought it would go away. It hurts worse than before. I was crying it was unbearable and my boyfriend isn't that large. But I could even hold out for him.

  55. Written by: Brett | February 16th, 2015

    We are 60 and have been married 40 years. I guess it was four years ago when my wife said "no more, it is too painful". I did not realize that she was in pain until then. She claims the pain is due to thinning of her vaginal walls, but will not ask her doctor about it. Even if that were so, I would not want to push her to use estrogen based products as we both fear the side effects. There is some breast cancer in her family history, She always has required more than intercourse to have orgasm but very much enjoyed receiving oral sex. Now she has no interest at all and says that I should handle my needs through masturbation. That leaves me so hungry for physical contact, but she has no interest in even holding or kissing me. So much is said about communication, but if I even try to talk about this she gets angry and defensive. I do not get try to force the issue.. I know it just leaves her depressed. I doubt this will get better, but writing may help so I thought I would try as getting it out feels a little better even if no one reads this.

  56. Written by: zara | May 12th, 2015

    I've been suffering with polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) for 6 years now and have always had trouble with insertion of tampons.I then got married and proceeded to have sex for the first time...sadly it was a lot less fun than I could've ever hoped.I remember not having sex on the first night as even having a single finger inserted hurt like hell. On the second night I decided to just brave it, and so I let my husband have his way with me. As he started the penetration itself I felt as if there was a barrier in the way regardless, I stayed silent and after slowly inching into me further... the barrier seemed to be ripping. The pain was unbearable (like 21 on a scale of 1 to 10) and when he started to move I felt like he was pouring alcohol onto my torn and raw flesh. Anyway I stayed silent till it was over thinking it was just that painful because it was my first. It's been 6 months now and it doesnt hurt as much...but it does still hurt like a bitch. I'm also often too dry Regardless of how turned on I am.

  57. Written by: Farah | May 25th, 2015

    Hi,same problem..i am not virgin but still face painful intercourse.


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