Gained So Much "
My story began at a young age when I was forced to experience things sexually I should not have been experiencing at that time. This affected me as it lowered my confidence self esteem and sexually which was not realised until I found a very special man in my life, we started to have problems with painful sex. I saw gynaecologists who told me there was no issue and it started to affect us even more I would not feel aroused or want to have sex but because of past experiences I felt I had to do it to be loved even though my boyfriend constantly told me this was not the case. 3 years into our relationship we bought a house together and we thought things would get better but they seemed to be worse. We did some research and found vaginismus and all the symptoms matched so I ordered the books and dilators. I was very scared but I persisted daily and continued to feel jealous of people who didn't have a problem and was ready for that to be me and to stop allowing past experiences to affect the now. I always felt I wasn't good enough and through working on the book I have gained so much in relaxation techniques, self confidence and self esteem. And finally the end came pain free but I know this is just the start of my journey in gaining more confidence and self esteem to better my life sexually and personally and not let things stand in my way. I am so grateful of the books and they have been a massive help. Thank you.
Beautiful, Loving, Nurturing "
I'm writing to express my thanks to you for writing such a beautiful, loving, nurturing book that has transformed my sexual relationship with my husband. Together for 16 years, this "issue" which went without a name for about 15 years had us both feeling ashamed, blameful and hopeless. Finally named by a sex therapist we went to for a consultation, we found your book, and worked through it together, along with using the trainers. My husband went so far as to practice the pc muscle exercises with me as his dedication to being part of the solution. Our sexual relationship has been transformed, thanks to working through the book. We can now have intercourse when we choose - it still feels delightfully novel and wonderfully surprising to have so much freedom and ease, and no more shame, blame or pain!
Thank you for writing in such a manner that I felt able to let go of the shame and negativity, and dare to to take each step that was so carefully and supportively laid out. My husband and I are truly grateful!
Felt cared for from the very first contact "
I am forever indebted to you. I don't know what happened but I closed off to my
husband for 23 years...then he had affairs....and I fell
apart completely. All that love and we weren't working intercourse-wise. I had a
book on vaginismus but it was all too psychological and made me just dwell on
myself for answers I never thought I'd find. I went to a doctor and he just
said, 'There's nothing wrong with you; women deliver babies though their vaginal
canal.' He didn't mention anything about my PC muscle, biofeedback, that there
might be others similarly situated. I left sobbing. As a last resort I searched
the web, found you, ordered the kit and got down to work.
The first thing I loved were the people on the phone. So well-trained. Careful
but direct. I just felt cared for from the very first contact. And you got me my
kit in England fast!
My biggest impression was from the declarations. I remember memorizing them and
when I went back to the book to look at exactly what was written, I remember
thinking how each word was important; each word was there for a reason and it
said what it wanted to say exactly right. I loved those declarations. I felt
like whoever was responsible for whole progam just loved .... well.. me. It was
like being taken by the hand and told I was OK...one step at a time...I am not
alone or even that terribly messed up. Mind over matter. I'm 57, had been
defeated for over 20 years and was in a terribly emotional state when I ordered
your kit and you walked me right through!
So I write today because today was the day when I decided having sex with my
husband would not be about concentrating on my PC muscle (unless I hit a
glitch). Today was to look at my husband, breathe him in, smile, be in the
moment and to start to really explore and enjoy this intercourse thing. And it
happened. I am delighted and filled with hope. I feel happy and normal, in
control and admittedly pretty emotional. It was easy and comfortable (not earth
shattering), sweet, and good for us both.
I also remember thinking when I was reading your book--everything I had ever
thought around vaginismus--about fears or myself etc. etc. etc.!--was somewhere
in that book. You never offended or alienated or scared me. I'm a big strong
girl--I'm a lawyer--but this was something I just couldn't figure out.
The only critical comment I have is this: My husband's penis is larger than
your largest dilator (I always believed that was the problem--his size). So I
just went to a sex shop and got a dildo/dilator that was the next size up...well
a bit more) and practiced the same way. I probably should have gotten 2
gradations but they're expensive and I thought I could do it.
Anyhow, I probably should have waited to write to you until I was less emotional
to share all this with you but I've been wanting to say 'Thank You' for a very
long time. It took me closer to 3 months to get to where I am today but I really
wanted to be sure I didn't trigger pain/fear. I'm also grateful that the program
focused on the control of the PC muscle; not endlessly trying to figure out how
or why I shut down. It was so present and future focused which I found so
positive. (NB: I did everything you told me to do in that book. I didn't skip
So with all my heart to all of you, I thank you. I simply must sign this: Love,
Amazing Experience "
After over a year of trying to consummate our marriage I decided to search
the internet for answers. I was tired of feeling like a disappointment to my
husband. I was tired of hiding the truth from friends and family..at times even
lying to them when questions about sex came up. I felt so alone. I still
remember the tears rolling down my face as I read testimony after testimony of
women with the same feelings and insecurities that I had. I didn't feel so alone
anymore! I sent my husband the link to the Vaginismus site as I really wanted to
order the kit, but he was more skeptical of the product & site than I was.
I had been to three doctors who all told me I just needed to relax during
intercourse, I left each appointment feeling more hopeless than before. I
remember even trying to drink a lot of alcohol so that I would be able to relax
enough to have intercourse (didn't work). Our marriage was in a rough spot-- him
feeling rejected and me feeling inadequate. For months, I kept bringing it up
and asking my husband if we could try the kit and finally after almost 2 years
in a sexless marriage he agreed to give it a shot.
Going through the program was very eye-opening for me and helped me learn
more about why I was tensing up so much. It not only helped me retrain my
muscles but also helped to pinpoint where a lot of the anxiety was coming from.
I realized that I had a very negative view of the male body from a very young
age -- so much so that it was disgusting to me. The program helped me realize
this is not the truth, that I was believing a lie because of my past. The
graduated dilators also helped it seem more doable to me. There were hopeless
days when I thought I would never be able to have sex (I could barely put a
tampon in) and the program made it seem attainable! And it was! After three and
a half months using the kit we were finally able to consummate our marriage just
after our two year anniversary!
It was an amazing experience getting to have a "honeymoon stage" two years
into marriage! I'm so thankful for this kit, those who have contributed to it,
and the women who boldly wrote in sharing their testimonies! I wish everyone
knew about this kit as a resource for Vaginismus so women would no longer have
to suffer silently!
Life-changing program "
I am writing to thank you so much for your wonderful program. My wife has
struggled with Vaginismus all her life, has never been able to make love, and
never understood what the real problem was. We have only been together for a
few months but with the help of your program these past two months, we are now
able to make love. Before and during the program it has been an uncomfortable
and challenging time for us, we have both learned so much, and we are so very
happy now. All thanks to your program which gave us the right information and
the right tools to change our lives.
My wife now feels fulfilled as a complete woman and not 'abnormal'
(as she always claimed despite my protests to the contrary) any more.
And very importantly she understands that this condition
was not her fault. I admire my wife for her courage to face her fears, and am
so happy I could be there to support and love her during this life-changing
program. We are much closer now and obviously much happier too. We could not
have done this without your program.
I have been using your program for about a month and a half now, and today, my
fiance and I were finally able to have sex again!!!!
This program really works and I thank everyone for making it possible to
provide this product to women in need of it. Thank you soooooo much for helping
my fiance and I overcome this!!!! This has helped save my relationship. Again
Thank you sooooo much!
Sincerely, Extremely Grateful
I can’t say thanks enough "
My story began when me and my husband first got married. We just got married 4 months ago and waited until we got married to have intercourse of any kind. I noticed when I went for my first pap smear that was over due, that it hurt and stung and felt like I was being ripped apart. I told the gynecologist I was in pain and she acted surprised and said nothing seems unusual but told me to relax which was hard to do. Later a few months past and my husband and I got married when we consummated the marriage it felt like shards of glass cutting me and it sent spasms down my legs causing my left toe to pinch a nerve that is still healing to this day. It doesn't hurt but it feels numb. I figured well sex is supposed to hurt the first few times but a few months went by and it wasn't getting better the pain persisted and I didn't know why. At one point it got so bad i couldn't get anything into my vagina. I never used tampons until I got married I tried them but I still don't like them.
I researched it online what this pain could be and found your vaginismus site and decided to buy the kit after thinking about it. I didn't want to go to the gynecologist as I was certain this is what I had since it only hurt when I tried to get his penis in. I have been working through the kit and it helped me resolve some underlying issues - I had a strict upbringing and was uneducated about sex. I learned alot working though the book about the female anatomy. Once I completed that stage I started on kegels and I was able to do those really well but still took a week to focus on them while working on the "Mind Over Matter Part" but the time I got to the insertions they looked intimidating and painful. But I just tried with the small one and kept working my way up to the largest one. I learned alot about my body and what kind of lubes it takes and how I should go about entering my husband . . . D4 gave me the most confidence as it seemed bigger than my husband.
One day we were in the mood and we weren't planning on entry but I worked it in like I trained and it went in pain free. I'm going to work one more week with the largest trainer to make sure but the sex it was a whole new experience. It even felt a little pleasurable. The more you practice the better it will get. I can't say thanks enough this is a great kit and I recommend it to anyone suffering from vaginismus. Working through the kit helped me learn more about female anatomy, my own body, and releasing underlying issues. It took about a month to work through this kit for me. I like that it's hands on and you can work at your own pace. Now I can move on and buy lubes and sex books . Thanks again!
Great work! "
Thank you for the prompt reply. The best thing I liked about you vaginismus is that you are very quick in response. A few years back when I send one email to vaginismus, I got a very quick response. I had many queries. Daily I used to write emails to vaginismus and every day I used to get response, which made me buy the “vaginismus kit” and which made my and my wife life heaven from hell. That is really great.
Yes, please go ahead and post my message on your website (with my personal information removed). That is what I want. I want people who are suffering from vaginismus, should read our story and buy the kit and make their lives also heaven.
I would like to mention one thing that I am from India. Please do mention this in your website. My understanding is that in India there is very less awareness of vaginismus which is very bad. Though we had consulted 4 to 5 Gynecologists, It took 5 years to me and my wife to understand that my wife is suffering from vaginismus. Surprisingly I live in one the biggest city in India. Other people should not take this long to understand the problem. Women in India are very shy about sex. Even the women are highly educated but when it comes to sex, they are very shy. If they are facing vaginismus problem, I doubt whether they will aware that they are suffering from vaginismus.
Finally I would like to say that you guys are doing a great job. You will have tons of blessings from all over the world. Great work!
Baby News! "
I would just like to send a belated thank you to you and your company. We now have a little baby boy and without your help I doubt he would be here. Thankyou! Thankyou!
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